Columnists

My justification? We don't watch really bad TV shows, and there are lots and lots of those.

What is, after all, in a name? You know what they say about the rose, right, writes our columnist.

The only reason I turned out as well as I have I owe almost entirely to the fact that I found, at a very young age, my soulmate.

I’d like to point out that some of us would rather eat dirt than let the general public hear our private conversations.

Where did society start going wrong? It all begain with Gym class

Both the other person who lives at our house and I are first-born children. It probably goes without saying, then, that we think oldest siblings are the best.

Let me guess — you were thinking just the other day that you are the only person in the world who is not achieving your goals by cheating.

There was a time when I'd be walking down the street, catch a glimpse of my reflection in a store window and be shocked that even though I expected to see one of the lesser Rolling Stones — you know, the freaky, dangerous guy who lives inside…

Columnist Mikel Kelly reminisces about one of his favorite articles from the Weekly World News.

On more than one occasion last week, I was reminded about the importance of laughing.

People are always coming up to me and sticking their phone in my face and imploring me to look at a picture of something.

I'm going to go out on a limb and suggest that if you are a regular reader of newspapers (either online versions or the kind you can fold up and take with you to the bathroom), you probably have a good idea what's going on around you. Convers…

I don't know why, but I'm getting so I know a scary amount of information about Bob Dylan.

I am not one of those people who can walk around while I'm brushing my teeth.

Since I changed jobs two years ago and no longer work with just one or two papers, I don't do tours of the office anymore. I now work on the central design desk, so somebody else has to take Cub Scouts and student groups around and tell them …

It took almost exactly 37 years for the other person who lives at our house to forgive me for going to a Beatles concert without her.

You really aren't somebody, I've decided, until your house has a name.

I don't believe in making resolutions when the new year arrives. Never have.

Dear Santa Claus,

I've been using this expression for a while (so, if you've spent any time at all in my presence you've probably heard all about it, and you have my permission go do something else, like organize your sock drawer) — but here it is: